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Drizzle, Vol. I: Into The Cold City

by Izzie Drizzle

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1.
Solvent 02:00
(verse I) i can see the eyes on the sun from my window i can see the sky turn auburn when the wind blows airliners going places i could never fathom chemtrails tattooed through the clouds into heaven witches trials with cinnamon and star anise helping to maybe heal the self doubt scarring me precious little life, starring me and not precious little life like things that make me smile wide i mean precious little life like precious little time left on the earth the way things are going i'll be left in the dirt pathetic fallacy, rain, hail, thunderclouds you can find me hiding in the mainframe underground keep a low profile, stay sane, so profound until i deem the day's pain over now (verse II) so disgusted, never see my face in the real light fall asleep at night like "is this really real life"? always wake up with a splitting head always wake up and i'm swimming red so i scramble to the surface and my lungs are like a furnace spit the blood out my mouth like the living dead spent too much time in the spinning dread wasting all my twenties just spinning thread into words on the page that i slur into microphones again and again, vision blurs as the cycle goes pop the cap off the bottle, hold my mouth open drizzle in the contents, let it burn, solvent
2.
Dreaming 01:56
(verse) i met you in a dream apocalyptic planets were reflected in the sea a spectacle indeed when i awake i always hope to see you next to me a stickler in my skull, i think about you endlessly catching butterflies that haven't been discovered yet watch em flutter high and laugh until the sun has set stutter over words like im tryna climb an avalanche never have i had a plan never ever had a hand in levitating magic land tethered to the reddest sand invented in my head i stand feathered at the edges and ready to escape the grand gestures of the everyman festering in heavy hands uzumaki spiral skies oozing happy fireflies lavander and watermelon oceanic siren cries i'll only quit the music if the vinyl dies but that could only happen after my demise it's my dream to have my soundwaves on wax light pink splatter disc flying out the stacks on acrylic platters spinning vibrating out my raps limited to 60 copies, get it while it lasts more sweat less blood gotta make it til i gasp my lungs are already bursting at the straps or bursting at the seams wait, you're squeezing all the air out of me it seems...
3.
(verse) there's soil in my chest where my heart should be roots in my lungs, when i inhale i find it hard to keep scrapes on my skin from always falling on my arms and knees pitch black fog, i walk ahead but i can hardly see i dance with aphorisms, cheat on them with feelings brain's a cataclysm, losing heat and freezing i gotta get outta here, escape to outer atmosphere i'm stuck shackled and confined to inner stratosphere self-discipline, that's what the bushido said hair scratchin itchin on my cheeks like mosquito legs skulduggery and skulls cover me ribcage prisoner, let the soil smother me you got me by the throat and i had no idea my abilities to actualize became my only fear here, take my limbs away like ciggies from a smoker you wear em round your neck, but i'm the only one who's choking
4.
Frogspawn 01:55
(verse) i see their eyes in the dark like pin holes to another realm take me to it, skrink me down i never feel my fucking self it's raining daggers in my house i'm a faggot, i'm a mouse afraid of confrontation therapists and consaultations skjera bagera ingenting tingeling migratory dopamine and pheromones mingling terror mode signaling the change of days i'm hazy when i hit the sink making waves, i'm pushing daisies every time i blink thirty-seven asteroids make up your constellation dirty heaven polaroids shake up your observation in a country rife with apathy it makes me write unnaturally toerag state, blonde menace and his cavelry nervous disposition i'd count the issues but i think i got some fingers missing i'm just a silence in the attic with a creaky floor that makes me panic i'm meant to be floating, i'm meant to be a ghost but every step i take up here bothers you the most
5.
(verse 1) every time i'm with you, wake to fire in the cauldron it's all on the table, free to cry in the open your room smells of cloves, hibiscus and milk thistle mugwart, vanilla oil and orange makes my skin bristle saffron and mango vapor you pop the grinder, i hand those papers we have words to make the plan go safer you lean in, and my hands start shaking breath's been taken and my air turns raggedy hide away my face cuz i'm scared that you're mad at me like all the others always seem to be a concrete jungle, missing all the greenery a guest in my own home i'd rather just evaporate and live up in the ozone oh no there's mould in the cupboard rather live among the aliens like L. Ron Hubbard mother mother you're a thirteen hour walk away a 2 second button press i listen to you talk away how's your day, how's dad, how's your health? if something went wrong, could i forgive myself? (verse 2) back to the witch's room feeling like my brain is encased in a wicker tomb living gloom but you tell me go ahead and watch the giving moon i feel my inner peace grow coming from within you all our time's valuable hold my hands above my head, you make my mind malleable galaxy projector, fairy lights and a salt lamp vegan ramen noodles, hair dye and a waltz dance Rupan sansei Kariosutoro no shiro watching anime until the clock hits zero zero and listening to bowie tracks produced by brian eno we may not be king or queen but we can still be "heroes" in other words, protagonists the insense burning is ever so balancing every time i feel your touch, stops my soul hammering with your strength and power, there's no damaging teaching culture from your region's silky tongue traditions, food and norwegian idioms like morgenstund har gull i munn gold in the mouth, you help me kill my gloomy mood i pray i don't fuck it up another bad luck birthday think i'll throw my stomach up don't let me fuck it up oh god don't let me fuck it up
6.
Room 03:00
(hook) i've never seen the sun, i've never seen the moon i've never seen a happy thought inside of you i hear your laughter, it gets me in the fucking mood to shy away from you, hide inside my room i've never seen the sun, i've never seen the moon i've never seen a happy thought inside of you i hear your laughter, it gets me in the fucking mood to shy away from you, hide inside my room (verse) your visage haunts me, staring from my phone screen everytime i see your eyes look in mine, my bones scream my stomach flips, i feel sick i wanna vomit out my heart but that's another thing to deal with your laughter makes my day worse, i hate to see you smile you took my lungs out, filled them full of bile but nothing tastes as bitter as your final kiss my only remedy for you is an earful of vinyl hiss i wish you well, i wish you knew that you upset me the tidal shifts, you're a ghost, i hope you don't regret me sick of putting effort in and getting nothing back so i just wanna crawl away and sit inside the crushing black my issues of abandonment made worse tenfold your blatent disrespect of that made me hang my head low i know your brain is hurting, well mine is hurting too i put my trust in you, a switch flipped, i'm nothing but a blur to you i'm looking forward now, away from your distinction trying to forget you, veins coursing with extinction you're nothing but a memory that i met inside a dream and i've finally woken up, i'm never going back to sleep (hook) i've never seen the sun, i've never seen the moon i've never seen a happy thought inside of you i hear your laughter, it gets me in the fucking mood to shy away from you, hide inside my room i've never seen the sun, i've never seen the moon i've never seen a happy thought inside of you i hear your laughter, it gets me in the fucking mood to shy away from you, hide inside my room i hear your laughter, it gets me in the fucking mood to hide away from you, i'll never leave my room

about

i want to forget.

credits

released April 1, 2022

written, produced and performed by Izzie Drizzle
recorded in The Witch's Room
mixed and mastered and additional vocals on track 2 by DAPHNE

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Izzie Drizzle UK

Trans audio pirate rapper from Ganymede.

(she/her)

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